I have, admittedly, been making fun of The American Culinary Society's Menu Maker (Marguerite Patten, 1973) for several posts, but it's out of love (well, mostly love, but also partly vicarious dyspepsia). I've been saving the thing I love most, though. This book has one of the most perfectly 1970s pictures I own. Feast your eyes on this chorus line of whole fish clearing the way for a billowy pineapple float.
There's nothing quite so peaceful (and by peaceful, I mean nightmare-inducing) as a platter full of whole fish in a starburst of citrus, chins resting on tomato slices and tails weighted with asparagus as their sunken eyes remind all who behold them that death comes for us all. And it will insist that some of us be coated with gelatin and put on a macabre display when we go.
That's why they need to be followed by the fluffy little cloud of pineapple-- so we can say "Ooh, cute!" Then we can admire the way the gold-tipped meringue points imitate the pineapple skin and the way the saved pineapple top completes the look, because the best way to put a pineapple on a 1970s dinner table is to completely deconstruct it and then reconstruct it again with ice cream and whipped egg whites to show off that one has the leisure time to fuck around with a pineapple all day.
Should you ever need put on a 1970s dinner party (and have an entire day to arrange garnishes, shellac them with fishy gelatin, whip and pipe egg whites, etc.), here are the recipes.
I think I'm just going to use the picture as the wallpaper on my desktop for a few weeks. I scanned it. That's as much work as I am willing to put into this menu.
Cut the top of the pineapple off very carefully. Are pineapples dangerous? I've cut them up before. It's not that hard. As for spending hours reconstructing one after cutting it up, no thanks.
ReplyDeleteI think the advice about being careful is because the top needs to be in good enough shape to put it back on once the meringue is cooked. It's not about safety, but aesthetics.
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