Suzy Chapin's Low-Calorie Party Cook Book (1971) dusts off this "word that has been out of use for about one hundred and fifty years" to describe "a perfect little cold lunch ... to be eaten in the gazebo, sun porch, or terrace." Moms like gazebos and weight watching, right? (Okay, stereotypical moms-- not mine specifically. She's more into scarfing down pork chops in church basements.)
Mom's nuncheon starts with the ever-exciting Vegetable Cocktail with Celery Swizzles.
If you couldn't guess how to make it from the title alone, there's even a recipe for dunking celery stalks in V-8. Fancy!
Then on to something pink and fluffy so it's extra girly:
Ham Mousse! Why enjoy a savory slice of ham when it could be ground up and congealed in chicken-flavored gelatin with more celery and some reduced-calorie mayo?
A fresh and delicious salad might help make up for the first two items' shortcomings.
Well, it might if it were actually fresh and not frozen green beans soaked in diet salad dressing and sprinkled with verging-on-rancid sunflower kernels from the bulk bin of the health-food store.
At least there's always dessert:
Granted, oranges taken out of their peels, mixed with other fruits, and stuffed back into their peels is not the most exciting dessert in town, but fancied up with a little orange liqueur and vanilla ice milk, this is the most exciting part of mom's special nuncheon. The party might be sad enough that mom will secretly be relieved if you forget Mother's Day next year.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go out for a walk and to yell at every passer-by who tries to wish me a happy Mother's day because they assume that all women of a certain age are moms. Some of us have OTHER PLANS, buddy.
Ah, nothing like the ever feared meal prepared by your children. Breakfast in bed? Under-cooked eggs, burned toast, and tea strong enough to get out of the cup and walk around the room if it wants to. A friend once observed the difference between mother's day and father's day. Mother's day was focused on mom spending time with her kids and family. Father's day was about dad going out and doing whatever he wanted without his family. My friend wanted a day without her family for mother's day. That would be the biggest reward.
ReplyDeleteThen obviously there's something wrong with her! ;-)
DeleteIncidentally another friend was really excited the year that her mother's day gift was a nap. Her husband announced that he was taking their 3 young children somewhere else so she could have the house to herself for a few hours. I kind of wondered if he forgot about it until the day of, and found the perfect last minute solution that could be perfectly free if you planned it right.
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